Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Vomitus Maximus

Well, I couldn't quite make 30 days without puking, but I did go from July 6th to August 4th and then let loose with a huge barf all over Matt's suitcase. He seemed to take it well, wiping it up without cursing this time but bemoaning my missing the 30 day mark.

Last month while on break Matt and I stopped at the Giant to pick up Matt's food items, some of which were thrown carelessly in the trunk of his little white 4-wheeler. When we got back to the apartment it appeared to me that a couple of things were missing as he carelessly threw items in the large cooler thingy. For three days, due largely to the outside heat, Matt stayed with me at home. On the fourth day Matt says he went to the car and opened the door and almost fell over from the stench. When opening the trunk he found the watermelon he forgot to take upstairs. So he threw it out and sprayed the inside of the trunk and 4-wheeler interior with Lysol. It seemed to work.

A couple of days ago when we returned from our tour of the exotic Midwest and Mid-Atlantic states and even Texas and Minnesota in the large red truck thing, Matt had the same experience again with stench in the 4-wheeler. But this time he loaded me and lots of stuff from the truck into the 4-wheeler, went to the same grocery store and got food stuff, then came home. Both of us smelled like the interior of the 4-wheeler by then. Uuugggghhhhh!

The next morning, rather than spray, he decided to empty out the stinky 4-wheeler completely (it had lots of junk in it) so he could wipe it all down. In doing this he found in the trunk an old package of once-fresh-and-delicious, Johnsonville brats (5 to a package, I am told --I can't count that high) buried under other stuff, that had gone VERY BAD over the past month. They were wrapped well, but they turned color and smelled powerfully rancid with old meat juice dripping. Considering the summer heat over the past month, it surprises me that there wasn't a pack of hungry, rabid dogs awaiting our arrival for the opening of the trunk, or perhaps buzzards circling overhead looking for their chance to grab some dead flesh.

With Clorox wipes and LOTS of Lysol spray, Matt hopes he has finally fixed the stinky car situation and that we can travel again without taking on an odor such as this. My money says he'll have to set the 4-wheeler on fire to really fix things. Matt refuses.


Omnibus Driver said...

You might want to stick an open container of charcoal or baking soda in the vehicle for a while and let it absorb the odors.

Yeesh. I don't envy you!

wickedwitch said...

ewwww. That's why you always check your receipt as you put your groceries away. That's one way to know that you retrieved everything. One package of hamburger got away from me and three days later I tracked it by the smell. Hope the Clorox wipes, charcoal and baking soda help. Trading my car in was the only answer for me. Fire may be the only answer for you.

Buster Kitty said...

I was going to have Matt put a couple of fridge Arm&Hammers in both the backseat and trunk, but instead he bought some pet odor carpet powder from the same company to sprinkle in the affected areas. After 5 days he vacuumed it up and things smell much better. Of course I can still smell the brats, but Matt doesn't seem to notice the rancid pig odor as much. Frankly, it's a wonder humans know when to bathe themselves. Hmmm. That reminds me, *lick lick lick lick*