Monday, September 22, 2008

Feast Of St. Francis

We're back on the road and driving lots of miles, about 3,600 in the first week, to be exact. Now we're out of hours and taking a day off to make them reset. Thirty-four hours of peace and quiet and Matt yelling and throwing stuff at me when I try to eat food off his plate. Aaaahhh. This is heaven. So relaxing.

Matt says we're in East Lexington, VA, but all I see is a parking lot with a lot of other trucks facing us. Two of them have dogs that keep barking at me, even though it's 2:30 in the friggin' AM. Looks like we're gonna miss the blessing of the pets at the local Lutheran church on October 4th. Yeah, something to do with St. Francis of Assisi or something. Guess he liked blessing animals to make them go to Heaven. Wonder if I could go there. Guess Matt doesn't want me to join him in the afterlife, or he'd get me blessed with all the other animals. Doesn't seem fair to me, no not at all. Doesn't seem fair that he eats in front of me, either. He eats some great smelling stuff, yes he does. Sometimes I forget myself and lunge toward him to grab it before it gets inside his mouth. He doesn't like that and yells at me.

MATT: You know, I shouldn't have to cut in so much to correct you. But I should mention that the blessing doesn't mean you go to Heaven when you die. It simply means you are blessed. Maybe you'll be healed of your ailments, or perhaps you'll be happier. But true salvation comes from accepting Christ as your Lord and Savior.

BUSTER: Anything in the Bible about pets doing that?

MATT: What? Accepting Christ?


MATT: Not sure, really... Animals are kinda dumb in the Bible,...and elsewhere.

BUSTER: Think He'd make an exception?

MATT: Hmmm... Depends upon where your heart is. (pause) Hey, I've got the St. Francis prayer for pets...if you want ME to bless you...

BUSTER: Sure, why not?

MATT: Okay, bow your head.

BUSTER: Okay (bowing head)

MATT: Blessed are You, Lord God, maker of all living creatures. You called forth fish in the sea, birds in the air and animals on the land. You inspired St. Francis to call all of them his brothers and sisters. We ask that you bless Buster Kitty. By the power of Your love, enable him to live according to Your plan. May we always praise You for all Your beauty in creation. Blessed are You, Lord our God, in all Your creatures! Amen.

BUSTER: I liked the part about the fish and birds. Wish He'd call forth some of them right now for me. Well, thanks Matt. I feel better all ready.

MATT: Hold on! Gotta sprinkle you with Holy Water.

BUSTER: Hey, is that the time? Gotta be going, I'd say.

MATT: It's 3am and we're out of hours, remember? Now hold still. (sprinkles water from plastic bottle).

BUSTER: Yeeeaaaaaccchhhhh!!!! (shakes violently) That's not Holy! That's Dasani!!!

MATT: I had to improvise. And there was no time for me to get ordained.

BUSTER: Oh great.

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